I am a face of a miscarriage

I am a face of a miscarriage. My little angel started his adventure to earth before Mother's Day 2009. My boyfriend, at the time, Charles and I were expecting our first child together. We found out on Mother's Day that we were expecting when I took 3 at home pregnancy tests because I was unable to believe the first one. We called our local health department and made an appointment to confirm the results which was still the same, pregnant. At that moment, they told me I was due January 22, 2010. We were both excited after we finally got over the shock of becoming parents. I already have one daughter from a previous relationship. As our adventure began we heard the heart beat at about 7 weeks, I know a little early but it was a heart beat and a very strong one. Since I already knew what the baby moving feels like I started feeling the little butterflies around 9 or 10 weeks. Then shortly later while Charles was at his mom's house. On June 26, 2009 at 10 weeks. I started cramping, but like the first pregnancy I didn't think nothing of it.  Then the spotting started, at first it was just light, then it increased over the next few hours just as the cramping intensified right along with the spotting. I finally couldn't handle the pain any longer and since I was staying with parents and my sister lived 2 houses away. My mom woke my dad up and told him we needed to get to the hospital right away, so we called my sister and woke her up and had her come and get my daughter at 2 am. We get to the hospital and they take me back right away. They asked me are you pregnant, I kept telling them over and over again yes I am pregnant. They wanted a urine test and a blood test to confirm that I was pregnant. They ordered for an Ultrasound to be done, and that was the moment of truth. No heart beat, no signs of a baby. They decided to do an internal ultrasound which they had to wait until 7 am. By this time I am scare as can be, couldn't get a hold of Charles. When they were able to finally do the internal ultrasound, they were finally able to locate the baby. They also confirmed I was having a miscarriage. They told me that was sac was abnormal and a lot of reasons could be behind why I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks.They gave me three choices; DnC, pills in the uterus to cause me to go in labor, or go home and pass the baby on my own. I chose to go home and cope with the lost that way. I finally got a hold of Charles right after I was discharged and he came over to help me cope, but as the pain started to get worst, it was like he was here physically but not emotionally. I would fall to my knees while walking to the bathroom. Roughly about 3 pm, I finally sent my baby up to heaven, that is where he became my angel baby grew his wings to watch over his big sister and his parents. At that time I just wanted to be with him, I didn't want to talk to anyone or be touched by anyone. I just wanted to lay there and cry and never stop crying. I finally let Charles hug me and didn't want him to let go. He did have to go back to his mom's house and let her know what happened. Soon after that day, our relationship started going down hill. I wanted to talk about the lost of our child, but as a man he shut down and it caused a great deal of problems. We did end our relationship like 2 months later.

 

As of now, Charles and I are still friends, and we are finally able to talk to each other about that day in time. We are coping together as parents of an angel baby. He finally told me why he shut down on that day. He didn't know how to handle it as it was his first child we lost.

 

I am a face of a miscarrage and my name is Hattie..I currently live in Gainesville, Fl.

 

Jordan Lee Eubanks.. lost at 10 weeks on June 26, 2009